… just don’t take it from me.
Yesterday morning, like every other weekday morning, I dropped my wife off at the local Metro North train station. As I started to leave the station, the one road that leads to the exit was blocked by a car discharging a passenger. I was fourth in a line stopped by this car, and others quickly started clogging up behind me. The passenger was taking her sweet time, standing with the door open and leaning in while speaking with the driver. Horns started honking. She then strolled to the trunk, casually removed her carryon-size suit case, put it down, pulled the handle up, closed the trunk, then moseyed back up to the passenger door and leaned down to speak (again) to the driver. Horns honked again. Without looking back, she held up an index finger in the direction of the mass of cars waiting to go about their business. Eventually, she stood upright and turned to go into the station, at which time the driver finally pulled away.
Lest you think the driver had no choice but to drop her off where he did, there is a short-term parking area (with several open spaces) next to that road, separated by perhaps 3 feet of grassy curb.
Lest you think this is a one-off event, rest assured it is not. I witness it just about every morning, and I’m caught by it one time in three.
I’m a reasonable person. I have no issue with waiting for a quick drop-off to happen. All I ask is that people show some awareness that they’re holding others up and move with some sense of promptness. If someone shows a modicum of respect for others by moving quickly and not wasting everyone else’s time unnecessarily, I’m cool.
But when someone callously disregards the inconvenience she imposes on others, when everyone else’s time is meaningless, when she holds up a crowd of people so that she can do what she’s doing unhurried… Fury is the aptest noun that comes to mind. It takes a special kind of arrogance and entitlement to act this way. It’s rude. It’s sociopathic. It’s sand in the gears of society.
If, when driving, you’re in no hurry to reach your destination, why impose your lackadaisy on other drivers by going slowly in the left (passing) lane? If you’re checking out at the supermarket, why wait until after the cashier has finished ringing up and bagging all your groceries before you start rummaging in your pocketbook for your wallet? If you’re on an escalator and don’t feel like walking, why stand in the way of those who do? If you say to others “what’s the hurry? You’re better off slowing down,” ask yourself how it’s any of your business how fast others choose to go through life.
If we’ve made plans to meet at a bar at 7, please don’t saunter in at 8:15 as if everything’s fine and dandy in the world.
People go through life at different speeds. There’s nothing wrong with this. We’re all different, we have different priorities and motivations, and on any given day I might be unpressed by any demands while the person next to me might be hustling through a busy schedule. Live your life as you will. But, start with the golden rule: do unto others as you’d have them do unto you. And, if you’re OK with others wasting your time, if you feel you’re doing others a favor by squatting in the left lane, add another rule to your style guide: other people’s time doesn’t belong to you.
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